Holiday Stress can be challenging. Look around any store, and you’ll find early reminders of what’s ahead of us- spending quality time with people we love, great food, fabulous parties, and more. Of course, we all hope our holiday season will be made of these, but that’s not always the case. Even in the best of situations, people struggle with excessive commitments, social anxiety, fallouts with loved ones, unrealistic expectations, and financial pressures. If any of those sound familiar, you may be wondering how to get on top of your mental health this year. In this 4-part series, you will find a way to manage the top holiday mental health concerns and start your 2025 fresh instead of frazzled.
Start Now, Not Later to Manage Holiday Stress
November can feel too soon to consider digging into holiday preparation, but if you want to enjoy some bliss this December, start the ball rolling now. Planning helps you take back control, and the time to plan your upcoming season is here! Managing the extra demands on your time early in the game is much easier. Why? You are more objective when you are not in a time crunch.
Tip #1: Give Yourself Time
One of the most effective ways to kick the holiday stress is to use planning to your advantage. A helpful rule during this time of the year is to assume everything will take 2 times as long as you think. When you plan upcoming errands, it can be hard to remember how time-consuming many of the demands are. This can lead to overbooking and excessive commitments, which leads to unnecessary anxiety.
Tip #2: Don’t Forget Yourself
It is easy to get so caught up in the swirl of holiday activities you forget to spend time with yourself. Reserving some personal time will help you keep what is important in perspective and help you manage stress during the holidays. We are vulnerable to poor moods when we neglect to care for ourselves. Need ideas? Check out some clever ways to enjoy the moment in front of you.
Tip #3: Prioritize
This holiday season, ask yourself honestly: what and who is truly important? What can go to the side if I begin to feel overwhelmed or rushed? Although it can be hard, learn to say no to things you do not want or need to do. If you need help figuring out how to prioritize, look to your values. Values, not external expectations, will guide you during this time. Need to know what your core values are? Don’t know what your core values are? Here is a great exercise to figure out what is truly important to you so you can put your priorities in order.
Tip #4: Practice Mindful Gifting
We all know this state of awareness is the best way to go about our day. You may not have known is you can also practice mindful gifting. When we have time to be leisurely about purchasing gifts, we tend to think more deeply about the person we are gifting for. If you take this time now, your gifts will mean much more to the recipient and yourself. Set aside time for reflection, list each receiver, and write down what they genuinely like and enjoy. Watch for clues if you still need to learn more about the recipient.
Holiday Stress, Anxiety and Depression
Holiday stress and depression can extend into your new year if not dealt with sooner than later. The tips and tricks above help answer the question of establishing holiday stress management tools through planning. However, there may be times when you need more help to deal with your anxiety. Finding the best cognitive behavioral therapist for you can be another tool when dealing with the holiday blues.
Video- How Does a Therapist Treat Anxiety Disorder? An Introduction to CBT Skills
If you are reading this, chances are you already know that symptoms of stress can feel overwhelming and, if untreated, can evolve into an anxiety disorder. The good news is understanding the biological roots can be the first step toward success. In this video, ‘Master Your Mind: Essential CBT Skills for Anxiety Symptoms,’ Dr. Rosalie Zuniga from Postpartum Wellness and I discuss what information I provide to clients in the first stages of anxiety treatment. If you want to know about the mind-body connection when you experience anxiety symptoms, check out the first part of this video to dive into the biology of stress. You can find more content in the second part if you’d like to try some practical strategies for managing anxiety disorder. Are you curious but not ready to watch the whole video? You can find an overview below.
The Biological Roots of Anxiety Disorders
Anxiety is more than an emotion; it’s an interplay of biology and psychology. The ‘fight, flight, freeze, fawn’ response is an instinct we have to stress or danger. This is also known as the ‘stress response’. In the modern world, this is not particularly useful. In very few situations, this phenomenon may be helpful (like if a bear is chasing you). However, when we ruminate about our fears, our brain believes we are actually in physical danger, and if it persists, it can evolve into an anxiety disorder.
Anxiety Symptoms
The symptoms of anxiety can vary but have some specific themes:
Excessive Worry: Constant, uncontrollable worry about everyday things.
Physical Anxiety Symptoms: These can include increased heart rate, sweating, trembling, dizziness, and shortness of breath.
Trouble Concentrating: Difficulty focusing on tasks or making decisions.
Sleep Problems: Trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or restless sleep.
Avoidance: Avoiding situations that cause anxiety can impact daily life and activities.
Panic Attacks: Sudden episodes of intense fear or discomfort, often accompanied by physical symptoms like chest pain or a feeling of choking.
It’s the Thought that Counts
As you have learned, biological reactions to specific triggers creates the stress response. It’s just as important to recognize that avoidance of triggers and catastrophizing will feed the belief that we can’t handle our complex emotions, which leads to anxiety. Below is a helpful equation from Dr. Aaron Beck, the father of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Dangerous Thinking + Helpless Thinking = Level of Anxiety Symptoms
Dangerous Thinking:
Imagine someone who experiences a setback at work, such as not receiving the promotion they expected. They might engage in dangerous thinking by catastrophizing the situation. For instance:
“I failed, which confirms I’m not good enough. What if people find out? Everyone at work will know I’m incompetent.”
Helpless Thinking:
Helpless thinking involves believing that whatever the imagined catastrophe is, they will not be able to handle it.
Using the same situation, this person may think, ‘I am so embarrassed, and now I have to go to work after this rejection. I’ll be in the bathroom crying all day. I will sit in silence in meetings, and I won’t be able to be of any use now because I’ll be a mess. I don’t think I’ll be able to date because I’ll just keep thinking about how inferior I am.’
CBT in Action:
The video ‘Transform Your Anxiety Symptoms: CBT Skills to Help You Feel Better’ discusses several interventions, such as ‘Decatastrophizing the Fear (Worst Case Scenario)’ and the ‘What Ifs’ to examine and test dangerous thoughts.
Although in a stressed state, we overpredict dangerous outcomes, the reality is that the worst case can happen. Our helpless thinking kicks in when we anticipate we can’t handle the worst-case scenario. I will ask my clients, ‘How could you cope in a healthy and strong way?’ ‘Is there a way you visualize managing the catastrophe in a way you would be proud of?’ My clients who come to me for anxiety treatment in San Diego often will hear me joke that we are not the fragile flowers we believe we are. All humans can survive and thrive under challenging circumstances, which is a vital understanding to manage anxious thoughts.
Where to Find More Information: Therapy in San Diego
For more details about this insightful session and to explore additional resources, visit Therapy in San Diego and Postpartum Wellness. If you are curious about your anxiety symptoms and wonder if you would benefit from treatment, head to Anxiety Treatment in San Diego – Assessment to see where you land on the anxiety disorder scale.
When You or Your Children Are Upset by News Reports- The Role of Vicarious Trauma
Media coverage of a crime, natural disaster, war, act of terrorism, or other disturbing event provides vital and helpful information. News reports inform us about what is happening and guide us on what actions we may need to take. However, excessive exposure to such media can lead to vicarious trauma.
Too much exposure to media coverage of distressing events can amplify our stress and make us and our children feel anxious. Continual reports on burglaries in our community, for example, may be as unsettling as accounts of far-off disasters because local news hits closer to home. Below are strategies to help manage the impact of media coverage on stress for you and your family.
Stress Reactions to Media Coverage that can impact Vicarious Trauma
Today’s technology enables live TV and radio broadcasts from around the world, as well as instant online news updates. The increasing prevalence of Internet-connected cell phones makes it even more challenging to avoid media coverage.
Graphic and disturbing images, combined with nonstop reporting, can make us feel as if we are experiencing the trauma firsthand. This phenomenon, known as “vicarious trauma” or “secondary trauma,” can be distressing.
Signs of vicarious trauma include:
Prolonged sadness and crying
Difficulty concentrating
Physical symptoms like nausea, headaches, and muscle aches
Increased fear and anxiety
Sleep disturbances and distressing dreams
A general sense of unease
Isolation and withdrawal from others
Outbursts of anger
Depression
Coping Strategies to Protect from Vicarious Trauma
Taking a Break from Media Coverage
If media coverage is causing stress or anxiety, consider these steps:
Limit media consumption: Avoid watching or reading news stories about stressful events and refrain from going online to follow coverage.
Fill the time with alternative activities: Develop new habits, such as walking, planning meals, listening to music, or reading books.
Avoid discussing stressful events: Reduce conversations about upsetting news with friends and family.
Seek professional help if needed: If symptoms persist, consult your employee assistance program (EAP) or a counselor.
Resurfacing Feelings of Grief and Anxiety that May Lead to Vicarious Trauma
For some, media coverage can evoke memories of past losses or traumas. This can happen even if the events occurred many years ago, leading to feelings of grief, fear, or sadness.
Tips for managing resurfaced feelings:
Recognize the impact of graphic images and stories on your emotions. Limit exposure if you feel overwhelmed or irritable.
Talk with someone you trust about recent events and past experiences that are affecting you.
Maintain regular eating and sleeping patterns to strengthen your resilience.
Engage in exercise, which can help alleviate painful emotions.
Seek solace in your faith community if it provides comfort.
Supporting Children’s Emotional Well-being
Children are particularly vulnerable to the effects of repeated exposure to violent or traumatic news. This can lead to fears about their safety and that of their family. Children who have recently experienced a loss or separation may be especially affected.
To protect your child from vicarious trauma:
Limit exposure: Monitor what your child watches on TV or online and what they read in newspapers and magazines.
Be present: Watch news coverage with your child and discuss their questions and concerns. This is crucial even for teenagers.
Clarify misinformation: Ensure your child has accurate information if the news involves local crimes or frightening events.
Spend extra time together: Stick to family routines and plan enjoyable activities to provide reassurance.
Professional Resources
If you believe that media coverage or related stress is resulting in vicarious trauma you or your family, reach out to professional resources for assistance. Employee assistance programs, faith communities, and counselors can provide valuable support during challenging times.
This publication was prepared with the assistance of Alexandra Mezey, LICSW, who has expertise in family therapy and employee assistance counseling. For more resources on coping with stress and disturbing events, contact your EAP or community support services.
Start Now, Not Later to Manage Holiday Stress